Parts Work
Our personality is made up of various fragments that correspond to the thoughts and sensations we experience. Parts work consists of giving voice to these fragments, to understand what leads us to perform a certain behavior, to have certain thoughts, to understand our feelings in relation to something. It is especially a great tool for working on parenting relationships.
What is Part Work?
Every interaction we have results in a series of information stored in our unconscious, a series of versions that we had to be, that is, parts, to adjust to what was happening in our lives.
For example, a child who can no longer demonstrate that they need attention because they have a brother or sister with special needs. The child in question "denies" the part of him/herself that is vulnerable and wants to be held, placing as predominant the part that helps the parents or does not demonstrate that he/she has needs not to give them more work.
But the vulnerable part does not cease to exist, it stagnates at the moment of trauma - because the unconscious is timeless - and continues in the shadow side of the personality, presenting itself as resentment for not feeling valued, loved, receiving attention.
And as long as it isn't worked on and integrated, this part will continue to affect situations from the subconscious actions that the person takes, their automatic thoughts, their "blockages" to do or not do what they believe is best for others and for themselves.
So the answer is to WORK WITH THESE PARTS INTERNALLY, from a compassionate perspective, to understand, welcome, forgive and integrate the fragments, strengthening the predominant personality.
What is Working Inner Father and Mother?
Relationships are our daily experience. And the first relationships we experience are with our parents (or their absence). The feeling of security, trust, acceptance and belonging comes initially from these first impressions that we have in life or not.
That's why it's important to work internally on the version we create of them, which reflect what we perceive from our interactions throughout life - which may have given us confidence or excessive doubts about ourselves.
The first interactions we have are with our parents, which generates an internal "copy" of each one of them, who internally already acts as the one who it represents, being that internal voice that forbids, says that it will go wrong or the opposite, that supports and that says everything will be fine.
But the most common thing is receiving fearful versions of life from our parents and them demanding obedience without necessarily realizing our internal universe (what we would feel better doing) because this was the reality they experienced and received from their parents.
So the answer is to WORK WITH OUR PARENTS INTERNALLY, giving strength, security, understanding, acceptance, love and support to our inner child, strengthening the adult version of that child.